I don't feel my age ... or at least most of the time I don't feel my age. There are moments where I tire more easily than I use to or I'll share a thought I'm having with someone at the very moment I have it because I know I'll forget to tell them if I don't and recognize that I no longer have the baby face I use to. (I definitely look more mature.) When I speak about various topics I do so in a thoughtful and mature way. You can tell that I'm
Like many adults, I work because I have to support myself. Since it's just me, how I spend my money is up to me. There is no one else I need to get input from on whether or not getting a Kate Spade purse is or isn't a good idea. Another reason I would argue that I "don't act my age" falls along similiar lines as I don't have a family to care for. Okay, I have Elsie... so yes, I do have a "kid" in some regards; however, amongst other things I don't have to run Elsie to soccer practice and worry about her academic performance in school.
In someways I've feel like people have unjustly judged me for the fact that I don't have the responsibility of a family. As if I don't want these responsibilities (which is SO NOT the case). In recent years, I've admittedly been quite selfish and childish about the things I tend to focus on and put energy towards, but in someway feel justified in being so as I spent a lot of my childhood being an adult, which is something I didn't realize until this fact was pointed out to me this past summer. Let me explain . . . .
In June I went to a writing retreat in Michigan. At dinner on the first night of the retreat I was sitting next to a woman who is currently taking time off from working to care for her parents as they are not in good health. In an effort to show her that I understood what she was experiencing I shared with her how from a very young age I knew my dad wouldn't be around my whole life and how I watched cancer take over his body when I was 13 years-old. Then, I told her how I took care of my grandfather on my mom's side my first year/ year and a half of college when Alzheimer's began to severely impact him. Now, I wasn't telling her all this as a way to be all "look at me" or trump her in anyway, but more to explain that I could relate to what she was experiencing. Once I was through sharing she said to me, "My goodness! You never got to be kid, did you? You've been an adult most of your life." To be honest, I never thought of it that way. It just was what it was. But she was right.
When I think back at all the things I experienced in my childhood, for all intents and purposes my "childhood" ended very early in my life. I guess in someways it's for this reason I don't feel the need to apologize when I act in a "childish" manner. We all have our moments and sometimes I just feel the need for "my moment" of weakness to last as a way to make-up for what I didn't have in the past. Whether this is the right way to approach things is questionable, but it's how things roll with me sometimes. (I've gotten a lot better over the years!)
I don't want to be a Debbie Downer and end this post in on a negative note. It's just things that this topic has made me think about. Often I as though I'm living life backwards and not moving forwards; however, I think that is the farthest thing from the truth. Though I still would like to think I will one day have the responsibility of caring for kids and a husband (which will make me seem like I'm "acting my age") I think the fact that I'm taking care of me and focusing on what makes me happy is one of the most mature things I can do and actually displays best how I "act my age".
Now that I've talked about how I'm "acting my age", please take a moment to see what my fellow bloggers have to say about how they act their age:
Merryland Girl (Melissa)